So I am posting again. I haven't been this twitterpated in a very long time. I feel like I have found a long lost sister and or brother. I recently read a blog, The Weed. To understand why this blog is so amazing I need to explain the search I have been on.

I married into a mixed orientation marriage. I am straight, and my husband is gay. As you might imagine this presents some very unique marital issues. Marriage is hard enough as it is. We both knew this would be hard. We chose it any way. There are millions of books on marriage and how to have a good marriage and how to improve your marriage, how to deal with cheating husbands, how to deal with forgiving each other, how to over come abusive personalities, the list goes on. There are NO books, blogs, websites, or support groups for mixed orientation marriages. No one is talking about it. There are websites about women who married gay men and how to get out of marriages like that. That was not the advice I am looking for.  I will admit I was looking for an oracle type advice fountain to reassure me that things would "work". I have long since realized that the same principles that apply to "straight" marriages apply to my marriage.  What the blog "The Weed" provided was a common experience check point. After long nights of searching and wondering if my faith in my husband and I was right or not I found the "Weeds" who have been at it years longer than my husband and I. The joy can't even be described. They get it. They know what it means to choose love. They know what it means to put a different priority on sex and sexual ego.

Their love story is beautiful no matter what their sexual orientation is, but even more powerful to me is the community they are building. We are not alone, no we are not aliens either. They have loving started calling themselves unicorns. I don't know how much my husband likes that, but I am happy to have a community to be a part of. One that gets the needs, feelings, situations that are unique to our world. I have a place to turn. It is fun to part of something that is just starting to exist. The "outside" world has a lot to say about our little community. Straight and Gay a like, most of it is so misguided. Some people get it though. They see the power in what is happening. I just had to share this.

**** Disclaimer*** I wrote this about a year or two ago but didn't get around to publishing it until now****

The offer - is bigger always better?

This week I have been going through the business process of mulling over a job offer, while not being unemployed. I have never had the *ahem* "pleasure". I don't know if I ever want that specific pleasure again. I have never been so stressed. The other company made a compelling argument for me to move. They offered me two months paid maternity leave, unlimited PTO, Company paid for phone and computer, among the other expected benefits. On top of doubling my pay, as it was. All those things were extremely tempting. If I had ever been presented with the scenario before I would have said anyone would have been the fool for not taking this opportunity. I am sure people will say that about me. I realized something this week. Not all "great" things are the right thing. Sounds strange, and kind of "duh" but the truth of that simple phrase has never felt so profound. There is something to be said for slowing down and doing things right. The offer that was in front of me, was great but I am not done where I am at. I have a playground, for lack of a better term, that will allow me to create and play in the business world on a stage that no one is really looking at. That is good because when I mess it all up, and I will - only human- I will be able to get back in that playground and start over. I wont be on the chopping block, I wont have dealt the fatal blow to my career. Give me two years and I think I will be ready to play with bigger kids.

I remember a time in my life something like this happened. I was in seventh grade, John Hopkins got a hold of some of my test scores. I had no clue I was smart. They wanted me to go out there and take some of their tests and basically start the process of going to college at that age. I was flattered then as a child. I had always been told I was weird and stupid, you know ADD and all. My mother stepped in and told me she didn't want that for me. She didn't deny how flattering it was, and how great it was that I was being recognized for my intelligence. She didn't want me to have that kind of life. Some might argue that I would have a better life and might be so much farther then I am. They might be right. My life would be so different. I would most likely be in some science field, in a lab some where doing heavens knows what. That is what I wanted back then. I would never have learned about my love for psychology and business. I feel like this offer is like that. Is it a great opportunity and would it change my life for ever and fast track me to a great career and position is life. Yes it might. I choose to take my time and not miss out on the foundational building blocks I would miss by moving so fast.

I don't regret passing up the John Hopkins opportunity. The fast track isn't always best, and bigger isn't always better.

Here's to the lessons I am going to learn, and to the projects I am going to build. *Cheers*